Above: Confused by his Anglo-Arabic-German-Jewish ancestry, Hampstead Village Voice Editor, Emmanuell "Mustafa" Goldstein decides to join the Italian police. Note the illegally dumped black refuse bag (bottom right). Ahhh - just like home!
Captain's Log: stardate 23-03-2009. Someone said it was High-tie-m I got a proper job and as we can see from the picture above, my new position of Il Guardia Del Firenze a la Caribinieri has been keeping me very busy indeed. Some might say the fact that I now earn €21,000:00 a year for standing in a concrete podium for eight hours a day is a complete waste of tax-payers money. Not a bit! It's money well spent, not least because it will stop me producing that blasted magazine that gets up everybody's noses. Besides, it's Italian tax-payers who'll be coughing up the pasta, so what do you care?
Incidentally, the allegedly scandalous 7th edition of the Hampstead Village Voice features Oscar winning member of Parliament Mademoiselle GLENDA JACKSON (Oooooh!), NICKY HORNE on JOHN LENNON (Blimey!), HENRY KELLY (Corrrr!) JON MOSS (Wehey!), ADNANDUS DYZANTAE (Ahhhh!), THE MIDFIELD GENERAL (Arrrghhh!) and KLAUS VON KUNST (Whoops!) and will be available for the whopping, post-recession price of £2 whole squid from the following outlets as of April 1st 2009.
Toodle Pip and arrivederci,
PS. My new boss, Snr. Il Ducci-Generalissimo Berlusconi assures me it'll be a very good read.