What the he'll am I doing on the side of a hill overlooking the picturesque town of Freiburg Im Breisgau in the Black Forest when I ought to be scurrying away getting the new version of The Hampstonian 2011, the Hampstead Village Voices prudent little sister, off to the printers? Well, for starters, it's a good opportunity to push the limits of modern technology and prove that one can do everything one can in Hampstead, without actually having to be in Hampstead. Let's face it, Hampstead's a bloody nightmare at the moment. One can' even buy a decent pair of Jeans for under £90 whereas in Freiburg I'll be picking up a pair of new jeans (not the worn out rubbish they sell at Crap) for €29! Hello? Can we get over the rip off Britain thing, please! Britain simply isn't that Great that it can overcharge for everything. It might have been once, but it ain't now, so grow up Englanders!
Alas, it appears one can't download a picture of the Black Forest onto an iPad so you'll just have to suffer and take my word for it: it's utterly beautiful.
Secondly, Freiburg's a lovely little town famed for it's lack of traffic and general green-ness. Somewhere from whch Hampstead could certainly learn a thing or two. You won't find the pavements strewn with stressco plastic bags around here. It would appear they still have something called dignity. But with that comes a dollop of austerity I would find hard to live with on a permanent basis. So I'll be heading back at some stage... As for the Hampstonian 2011....
Worry not! Your very own Mustafa is on the case and will spend the 7 hour train journey to Berlin finishing off The Hampstonian 2011 on his lappy top to have at the printers in time for the run in to....Argh...I day not mention the C word whilst it's still October. In time for December! By the way, it's going to be a vast improvement - if that were possible - on the 2010 edition and will include amongst other things a Restaurant guide and a "where to get free WiFi guide". How very splendid!
As for edition 12 of the Hampstead Village Voice, it is still in conception but ought to be on the shelves by January 1st, 2011.
Mustafa "Lord Whore-Whore" Goldstein
PS. Germany is also a very good place to buy Jeans if one is 6ft 7inches tall. More about that in the next Voice.